Once upon a time, I could lose myself - pt 3

Well, well, well,  Manchester night 2.

A lot of people seemed worse for wear, the weather turned to rain and my dastardly cold was developing at a rate of knots. Bizarrely, I didn’t actually feel like going to the gig at all. I was subdued, tired, was thinking about various situations in my head and feeling progressively worse throughout the day. I also still had to find someone to take badges to Amsterdam – not as easy as you may think (but it was resolved thanks to a wonderful Greek family). 

Time in the pub before the gig seemed endless, I couldn’t garner enthusiasm for much at all really. I apologise to everyone for my grumpiness! 

Running through the heavy rain to the venue, the night didn’t bode well. Once in the arena and on to the floor we took the same spot as we did on night 1. For many attending, this was the last night of somewhat of a ‘mini tour’ what with these being the only PJ shows in UK (excluding IoW). The crowd immediately seemed more at ease than on night 1, maybe the first night eased any concerns and people were there to build on the previous night. 

Manchester night 2 was an amazing night. 

Whilst my lack of ability to breath very well stopped me jumping and bouncing as much as I wanted to, from the very beginning it was elating. I am sure everyone in that room could feel it, I could see the joyous expressions on people’s faces everywhere I looked. The set started by blasting into Go, Animal and Hail Hail...and kept on coming! 

The fourth song played was I Am Mine, a favourite song of mine, and one I have gone on about wanting to see (the remaining ones are Footsteps and Oceans). Let’s be honest,  I welled up and wibbled. Not quite to a Chloe Dancer/Crown of Thorns level melt down but I was heading down that road! 

Save You, Present Tense, Deep, Life Wasted (And Wasted Reprise) were all just insanely good. Then, the bloody band pull Hitchhiker out, for the first time ever, even if Eddie did fluff the words, I don’t care. I could actually just list the entire set, it was just ace. I can only use superlatives to describe it and the atmosphere that surrounded me. Somehow this gig felt like a club gig despite being in a huge arena. There was an intimacy to the show. The story behind Deep stood out, I’d wondered where those lyrics came from, so I found that really interesting. 

There in that gig my love for the band changed from comfy slippers to lustful desire. It made me happy, it made me emotional.

A friend said to me later, ‘that was my band on stage tonight’ – I think he was right, that was 'the' band on stage. They seemed more relaxed, more engaged with each other, and whilst they always engage with the crowd, they appeared not to have to work so hard to do it. I hope the bootleg picks up the feelings and captures the crowd, I’m not sure if it will be able to, it might be one of those gigs you had to be at. 

I am not saying that it ticked everyone’s boxes, there will be some who preferred night 1, or want different setlists from other albums or rarities, but I loved it. It was a whole experience for me as I was surrounded by great people. People who open their hearts with no expectation other than that of respect for one another. I can only repeat how lucky I feel to be included and spend time with them. You’re all bloody amazing, and I am pleased to have met you all.

I left that venue full of hope, elated at seeing so many happy people and damp from others peoples tears of joy. 

I didn’t get to spend time or even see all the people I’d hoped to over those couple of days, I’m sorry for that but there will be other times I am sure. 

Before this gig, I’d been talking to friends about what makes a Pearl Jam show for me, what makes them different, why I don’t queue or do the rail, why I prefer GA to seats...a different set each night and if you saw us during Alive or Yellow Ledbetter – that’s why! 


"Ooh, once upon a time I could control myself, yeah...
Once upon a time I could lose myself, yeah, yeah, yeah..."